You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx