i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
