I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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