everyone is single if you try hard enough
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
