this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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