no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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