she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
