Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
