If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Randomize
