went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
