I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize