I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Its about making memories worth repressing
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
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