did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
