Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
this boner is exhausting
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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