Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
the liver wants what the liver wants
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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