His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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