i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
