What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
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my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
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She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize