Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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