and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
25 Of The Most Common Life Mistakes Young People Make
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
25 People Confess What They Really Think When They See An Obese Person
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel