just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Randomize
