I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Randomize
