Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
Randomize
