AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
