Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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