you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
All I want is dick and wine.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize
