Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize
