Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means