Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize