She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
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