Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize