What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
you made out with another girl for some wings
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
