the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize
