even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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