i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
