after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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