walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
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