Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk