thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
