I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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