I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize