How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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