I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
This house was built for laser tag.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Randomize
