UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
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