Christians are straight up FREAKS
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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