woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
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Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
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Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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