so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
