Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
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