So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
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