woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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