i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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